The Neurotic Wanderer

I think that this meant something slightly different than it did maybe say....six months ago? Now when I plan my hike, I do so to minimize my likely hood of running into other people and bringing my mask, in addition to all the other safety things I usually bring with me.  And while I know that the likelihood of becoming infected with COVID 19 while recreating in the outdoors is probably pretty low, I would rather be safe than sorry, hence the mask and appropriate social distancing. I try and pick trail in which there are little to no people, pick a time a day in which there are little to no people, or where I can easily move far enough off trail to minimize contact. For the times that I cannot do those things I bring my mask so I can quickly cover my mouth and nose. I am lucky enough to have several cloth masks that I rotate between, I don't feel bad about using mask only for this purpose before washing and disinfecting.  So in addition to thos...

Hanging Gardens (No Official Trail) I really tend to be a creature of habit. I often struggle to go outside of my comfort zone (part of that is fear which I will touch on in a later post). However, I know that variety is the spice to life so to speak and I'm grateful to have friends who challenge me to try new things. With that being said, I have create a list of trails that I would like to try this year, in addition to the trails I have found to be tried and true. New To Me Trails: Camelback Mountain (which I was lucky enough to complete with the family already) Wave Cave Trail- Superstition Mountains Hieroglyphic Trail- Superstition Wilderness Seven Falls Trail- Sabino Canyon Recreation Area Lava River Cave- Coconino National Forest Kendrick Mountain Southside Trail- Kendrick Mountain Wilderness Picacho Peak- Picacho Peak State Park Passage 1 of AZ Trail: Huachuca Mountains A lot of the trails mentioned I actually took from the 52 Hike Challenge Guide, so sho...

So September marked my 30th year on this Earth. I really didn't want to celebrate my birthday this year since all celebrations seem meaningless still, but I was pretty glad to be officially in my 30's.  I feel like age has finally started to make me a little bit more confident in myself and I'm grateful to have the luxury to do so. I know that turning 30 can be a big deal and most people make a big deal out of it, but I just didn't want to do that. I wanted to just exist and be grateful and reflect on life up to this point. So, despite protests from friends and family, I packed my backpack and hiked the Grand Canyon. I know that for a lot of people visiting the Grand Canyon, means walking along the rim trail, listening to a Ranger talk or shopping all of the neat stuff in the visitor center (and there is nothing wrong with that because we all have our own path), but for me the Grand Canyon is a spiritual experience. Whether you chose to believe in a diety or not, the Gr...

There is so  much information out there about this place, and a lot of it is outdated or incorrect. So I'm hoping to share some information on here for those who may be interested in visiting this wonderful and beautiful place. A Little Backstory Fossil Creek is one of only two bodies of water with a Wild and Scenic River designation. The designation came in 2009 and has undergone tremendous efforts in restoration. This was largely in part thanks to public outcry at closing the APS dam and restoring the creek to its former glory. This was a big deal in and of itself since this was first in a series of dam retirements to happen across the country. While the Childs power plant is significant to Arizona history, it not longer had any use in present day energy needs and was found to be detrimental to this delicate riparian habitat. And with that, the dam was taken down and Fossil Creek restored. There are still historic placards in place to remember and pay tribute to the important...

I've done three solo hikes since I've last written about hiking. My funk had not really cleared but I was starting to feel some physical effects of not being outside and active. Unofficially, I believe that I have a severe vitamin D deficiency, which manifests itself pretty severely if I don't go outside or take supplements. So for my first hike, I forwent the sunscreen for about 15 minutes and didn't wear a hat. I went alone, in part because I went during the day when most of my friends are working, but also to be able to just sit there and feel my feelings. There was hardly anyone on the trail and the sun was shinning and for the first time in a little while I didn't completely hate everything. I took a resistance band and did some arm exercises in an effort to tire myself out as much as possible. I was only out for about an hour and a half, but it was enough to remind me that outdoor is where I belong. I love being a couch potato and playing video games until my ...

I can officially say that I lost who I once was.   There are some vestiges of who I once was left, i.e. my uncomfortableness at being in large crowds and my love for the outdoors, but overall I am different. If you are here, you are about to witness my journey back to feeling and to a place of healing. I realize how hokey that sounds, but if you have ever suffered loss, then you understand. My brother died by mental health issues. The amount of guilt, self-loathing and anger I feel, for both the world and myself, is all encompassing. Where I had hope, I am now left with feelings of loss and emptiness. I am surrounded by an abundance of love and support, however it is but a small salve for a gaping wound. My initial intentions for this blog were to really highlight hiking, exploration and adventure, and while that will still be a large part of what I post, the purpose behind it all is different. I will also likely include things that I find help me during this process, what...

Was a huge success!     This was hike #25 of my 52 Hike Challenge  and I'm so glad that it was. I first attempted Mt. Humphrey's about two months ago and it was a bit of a disaster (more on that experience later). I hadn't done a hike that week and I could feel my moodiness returning to me, so I decided last minute to try this hike again. I did some research to better understand the hike and how best to prepare (last time I relied on the information of the other people in my group, which was a big mistake). My first attempt of the hike gave me some insight as to how the first, and easiest, leg of the hike was going to be, so I knew I just needed a bigger picture. View from "the saddle"     In my research I found that there were several "false peaks", meaning that you would look at a peak and think it was THE peak, only to get there and see more peaks beyond that. I would say that there were 4 to 5 of them in the last mile of the hike. That for...

    So, after the fiasco of my last hike, I knew that I had to get right back out there and work it out. Mend the relationship after an argument, so to speak. I've still been in a pretty bad head space and I can honestly say that I cried for like a solid mile out there, but the hike itself did what it needed to do. I felt better afterward and felt like I had created a plan to get me through my problems. It felt good to find a trail that was fairly challenging and required me to just focus the task at hand. Before I knew, my shoulders were no longer up near my ears, my face became less of a scowl and more at rest and my mind felt less restless. It felt good to be doing something where I had to push my body.     This was a hike that was 75% unfamiliar to me. I had hiked part of this trail before with my dog, so I knew the basics of the terrain. However, I went on a day where the day prior we had had some monumental monsoon storms, so I wasn't exactly sure what I ...

    I never really thought it was possible to have a bad hike...until a few days ago. I decided to take a hike after I got out of work. It was a hike that I was fairly familiar with, so I didn't really feel the need to look too much into it before heading out. My first mistake was opting to go the opposite way that I usually go. I thought that changing it up might be good. It was a hot, humid day, and I was already starting off in not a great head space ( I don't consider this depression as it is not often something I endure). But hiking is usually the best cure for that. After the first mile, all thoughts of the technical aspect of the trail are gone and I start to focus on the five senses, and I just find that I have a great appreciation for everything. Hiking is truly a meditative experience.      However, on this day, I just couldn't reach my meditative space. The section of the trail that I chose first, paralleled the busy road, so all I heard was the rush...